elainegrey

Best thing Sunday morning: breakfast of fuyu-ish persimmon, yogurt, and pecans. Heaven. Saturday morning was a cubed, slightly stale Portuguese roll, some of the candied pumpkin, eggs beaten with cream, and baked - variation on French toast and a bread pudding (i guess?)

Christine's been watching  Oliver Stone's JFK, and Saturday night it wound up, with a number of long monologues about conspiracies and what America ought to be. That was 1991. Before the Waco & Ruby Ridge, the Oklahoma City bombing, hanging chads in 2000, and everything else. It felt a little surreal to try and wrest my mind back to the age before.

I had finished Adrian Tchaikovsky's 2004 Alien Clay, which has the Mandate as the brutal authoritarian state the main characters were resisting. During the election returns earlier this month i read Lyda Morehouse's 2001 Archangel Protocol, and as Christine watched JFK, i read the sequel Fallen Host.  The AngeLink Universe has a network of religio-authoritarian governance.

Exhale.  The reading and the current politics swirl together in a emotional reaction soup that i am not dealing with. It's a big pile of too much, too unknown, and i can't believe H.R. 9495 passed, please let the nonsense die in reconciliation.

--== ∞ ==--

I am dealing with work and trying to take care of myself. This weekend and today went more or less well. I didn't deal with various regular physical care for myself, but i got some weeding and raking done this weekend and feel very good about it.

Today i did all the during work self care: a morning ten minute walk, standing for 60 minutes, lunchtime coffee, afternoon kukicha (green tea high in L-Theanine). I worked in the yard by twilight and then with a head lamp on. I'm not feeling quite as overwhelmed, although [don't think about it, focus on the feeling of  okayness]. Well. Anyhow. I am feeling OK.

I am dealing with a certain amount of shame at my enthusiastic engagement during a meeting today. (Probably ADHD rejection sensitivity at the root here; the other person with whom i was being enthusiastic and energetic also has ADHD and we ran over every one. Ugh. And i had invited my manager. Die under desk. Ooof.)

But generally, yay, doing good.

Morning writing tag because this was originally Sunday morning's journaling.