elainegrey

Conscious news consumption: I haven't yet come up with when or why i will read news. This past weekend i was researching in response to various prompts: Sierra Club, for example, is fighting the repeal of the Inflation Reduction Act of 2022 that brought all the green energy stimulus. I was trying to find our if there were specific things in the county, so i could post something on the county mailing list. (The one big thing that might bring jobs to the county is unpopular for several reasons, and seems likely to fail regardless of the federal funding.)

I now have four sources i am checking for responses to the anti-trans XOs. One is a substack, so i receive that in email. Filing the news in Zotero seems a way to hold emotions at bay, a sense of control.

NYTimes is still something i turn to more for diversion (Ooh, Grammy's red carpet!).

I've since found another NC news source that is free and apparently reliable, NC Newsline is part of a nationwide network of "non-partisan coverage of state policy." - https://statesnewsroom.com/

• https://ncnewsline.com/
• https://carolinapublicpress.org/
• https://www.theassemblync.com/

Faced with the removal of the Yuletide fire hazard from the house and its array of lights, i bought some LED candles.  These will join the branch i wrapped with LED lights last year as all year glowing cheer. The lengthening days are wonderful, but it's still very dark in the mornings. This morning i was greeted by a crescent moon low to the south and the big dipper overhead -- and probably a Starlink satellite from a new train of them zipping overhead.  There's still patches of icy snow on the back deck, around the house in the pines' shade, but much melted by the time i walked Carrie down the hill after work yesterday. The creek still has big areas of ice.

One of those seven commitments was to be aware of my creating power, with the prompt claiming that by creating we can see ourselves as actors and not passive consumers. In the last week i created

• scientific data with CoCoRhas contribution
• requirements at work which translates into keeping libraries effective.
• a sketch as part of emotional care at work (and possibly some other sketches)
• a lovely dinner on Sunday with orange butter sauce over seared bay scallops
• a loaf of my breakfast bread
• a meditation for motivation to try to help me get moving

Summary: Snow! I felt heavy and was not very productive yesterday so i made a call to see about free assistance that might not be a good fit for me, but it's a step.

Sparkly fluffy snow! They'd backed off of any forecast of accumulation so, here we are with maybe an inch. It's a teacher workday in the local school system so i've no idea how that affects kids, but parents were well warned.

Yesterday i was filled with a heaviness. I think part of it is talking with my manager about doing strategic goal work and a nice size part of me wants to die. It's the part of me that sends me into the kitchen to eat SOMETHING to run away from expressing an opinion in email (and since that's my job....) There certainly was part of it being the new political climate, but i suspect more was the discussion with my manager (that went very well and was positive but ...).

So, i'm getting a wellness coach through the EAP. I was hoping the coaching program would be much more free-form to meet my needs and problems, but it looks like there area menu of "programs." I took the dealing with stress one, there's another on burnout that might also be twisted to meet my needs.

I spent non tribal amounts of time in the past week thinking about how coaching might help me since i had learned free coaching was available. I think there are some clear things someone can help me with. But it's a free benefit so i figured i should see if it helps. At worst i loose 90 minutes over a month or so and i'm loosing more than that now. A reasonable expectation is that i decide it might be worth paying for and then i look for an ADHD coach. I'm reading "How to ADHD" and the time blindness section is resonating so strongly and then the motivation section -- opens section and begins to skim -- The problems resonate, the solutions look nice on paper but there are so many and i can't do them all at once. Deciding which....

Notes below.

Made some excellent progress in improving schedule and task management over the past few years. However, the increased effectiveness at work plus a couple years of a health issue have me feeling very challenged by the rest of my life. My current tension is that i tell myself i will do things, should do things, want to do things, and i am "not in the mood" -- lacking energy or focus . When i have been on target all workday, i have a hard time directing myself after work, even if it is to do pleasurable things, or things that will relieve stress, or things that will feed my heart and soul. * I want to do too much - have "COE" tool (Condition of Enoughness, set only one thing to do - insert maniacal laughter here) * Time blindness * I don't know how to celebrate or increase dopamine, pleasures turn into work * i don't know how to set up a virtuous cycle: "wins" like meeting goals tend to "let me out of this straight jacket" feelings * i easily forget goals unless they are in front of me Cycle 1: the intention cycle * coe Cycle 2: the inspiration cycle * colored pencils near couch * books near couch

Today, i'll just inventory my sources as i become more intentional about news reading.

I'm not currently the intentional news reader i would like to be. I scroll through headlines and skim articles about "lifestyle" topics. Nonetheless, it seems we are doing our best to keep text based journalism alive. Not necessarily print, but traditional reporting. We subscribe to

• the Guardian (Christine)
• WaPo (Christine, truth done died)
• NYTimes (me)
• (NC) The Assembly (me, recently)

I think there are other news subscriptions Christine's made but i haven't bothered to connect to. The Economist, perhaps? I was glad when Christine asked about supporting the Guardian as i read many links that Dreamwidth's oursin posts and appreciate them. I never really read WaPo and am certainly not starting now.

The NY Times i read more in 2016. I now find it comfortable source of cultural topics -- style, fashion, cooking, sports, science -- i read the website headlines and don't usually read deeply.

I just subscribed to The Assembly, as i am suspecting that political involvement at the state level is going to be necessary to roll back the political gerrymandering and corrupt money that has brought us to this point. It has very long-form reporting and i hope it enables me to be more informed and more effective.

I had been supporting the county newspaper, but it was sold and became irrelevant, so i stopped a couple years ago and haven't found a replacement. The county has a semi-moderated mailing list and online newspaper maintained by a local.guy who, when i arrived in NC was running a forum site that seemed full of tea party/MAGA radicalism. I don't trust him, but the resource is an insight into the county attitudes. I looked around and found some campaign statements from him in 2008: he seemed reasonable then.

Other sources of news:

• https://www.electoral-vote.com prior to 2016 this wasn't such a daily news site, but with Trump's first election this became a good site for meta reporting (covering the coverage) along with analysis. I couldn't tell ages ago what the "bias" of the site was, but it was written by two highly educated professors for folks who could stand complexity. Which is now a bias.
• https://yaleclimateconnections.org/topic/eye-on-the-storm/ this used to be the WeatherUnderground blog but after selling the Weather Underground the blog moved here. Long form pieces about climate, hurricane analysis, and a steady drumbeat of round up reporting about hottest month, hottest year.
• https://spaceweather.com/ A different sort of news.
• https://whatthefuckjusthappenedtoday.com/ Just started this recently and i'm not really taking to it, but it's yet a different summary.

I guess these coming weeks i should observe my news consumption.

So, there were good looking beets at the grocery last week: a rare event that led to me snatching them up.  Over the weekend i had pulled a recipe for roasting them (covered in a Dutch oven, with a bit of water, 400°F for 30-40 min) which noted loving to prep them this way for sandwiches.

Sandwiches?

So i have now had three beet sandwiches - -huzzah for getting a mandoline-- and the last one was divine as i have now made a highly seasoned cream cheese spread with ginger, horseradish, tangerine zest, tangerine juice, pepper, and my dried (fermented) onion powder. And cucumber, but oh the beets and that spread.

Lots of different style beet sandwiches out there, including Reuben inspired seasoned beets, but this seasoned cream cheese was so satisfying with the beets.

Saturday: Ice here over a dusting of snow.  As the sun came up some low clouds formed in the trees, fog of a sort, adding to the glow around the sparkle of light in the ice.

Now midday, a slow rain of melt water spatters while birds call and hunt for food. The sunny side of our yard is completely clear, so i'm sure they will forage well.

I'm in a cranky mood....

( Sunday ruminations )

Un posted from Thursday

"What have I recently introduced into my life that's brought me peace, joy, or comfort?" I am excited by the kintsugi kit. Last night i fixed one, and made significant progress on another of the two broken tiny china plates of a set of four. We'd bought them to be cat plates, for serving things like the dab of whipping cream we give Luigi after dosing him with a pill each night. The plates were a pleasure to replace the ad hoc yogurt lid or dinner plate. Breaking a few was, well, OK, they weren't incredibly precious, but i chipped the first one so soon after we got them.

I plan to practice some amount of visible mending on a well used, well loved T-shirt of Christine's. I was surprised to realize the clothing practice of visible mending is the same aesthetic principle of kintsugi.

Happy New Year!

May we all find places of safety when the political reality is too much, may we all know compassion and kindness and joy. May our health improve. May we find success and joy and satisfaction.

--== ∞ ==--

I've just declared email and post reply bankrupcy. I'll probably try do to the same in other places i feel too overwhelmed.  I guess i could sort of manage a housework bankrupcy if we were willing to have someone come in and clean, but i think Christine's a little too fragile right now. The holidays, so many family gatherings, and possibly the dramatic temperature swings bring on the elephants.

I've gotten some postal greetings and small gifts out, some shipped on Christmas Eve afternoon, others shipped yesterday at ten minutes to closing. I have thank-you notes written last January still in my card box. Sigh.

--== ∞ ==--

Reading

Gift books include the requested foraging book, Nature's Gardens by Sam Thayer; Kintsugi: Finding strength in imperfection that was paired with the requested kintsugi kit, and Sedaris' Holidays on Ice. I'm proud i did not see that many books i needed to bring home from Mom's library because no shelves. Tsundoku for life.

A Passion for Specificity sits in Kindle for both Christine and i to read.

--== ∞ ==--

Food ways

Apple-cherry pie with Vietnamese cinnamon is good. Canned cherry filling is pricy, though, so i was glad to have also found a bag of clearance apples that filled out the one can of cherry filling i bought on impulse.  I am very pleased with my growing skill at prebaking pie crusts (i buy the rolled up pre-made crust, one step at a time). I don't usually put a crust on top because usually i'm making quiche. This time i followed some advice that you should shield the crust at the beginning to keep from being burned later. This advice was a fail for me, as the egg wash glued the crust to the shield and i think i was more at risk of burning as i tried to remove it. Still, the "2025" decoration survived and the attempt at making fireworks with colored sugar wasn't ... a complete fail.

Yesterday, i finally got around to air frying some frozen battered oysters: yum!  I had them on a bed of rice and limas seasoned with a poblano cheese spread i made when i over roasted the last of my poblano peppers. That has worked well to rescue that infelicity.

Black-eyed peas and Brussels sprouts (surely the tiny brassicas count in the good luck dining?) for dinner tonight, possibly with corn bread, although that seems to be calling some elephants as Christine has gotten tangled with this concept.

Yule week is pretty fuzzy in my mind. Exec functioning evacuated for a few days and i rested. Or "rested" as i am sure i was thinking about gottados. I did eventually write a Yule letter to send and on Tuesday, Christmas Eve, took packages to the post office. No line! (Eye roll).

Brother N's clan arrived on Monday evening from Singapore (and for Z, from Tampa) by way of visiting grandparents in California.

Christmas Eve we gathered at my sister's with Dad, N's clan, and her husband's sister A-- and her kids and husband. Christine ghosted through and left. I stayed for dinner and an ornament exchange. After A's family left we started a gift exchange -- i'd hoped Christine would make it in time to join, but she ran late and the exchange raced ahead. Christine was back in time to give hugs to N's clan and Dad, then hung out with NYU student W-- and his classmate T-- and talked music. She was in heaven.

The next morning i abstained from going over to sister L's: we'd been there late. Christine had been sad that my family has calm quiet times early in the morning when she's no where near caffeinated enough.

Eventually Christine was up and we did a gift exchange. Instead of ordering the single color Prismacolor premier pencils i asked for, i now have the 132 colors. SO many colors! We now also have a software defined radio ... receiver? "dongle." Essentially, you plug this into your computer, plug an antenna into it, and you can hear and see radio waves. Thanks to miracles for inattentive beings, it covers the frequency band i am most concerned about: the signals for my weather sensors.

I can go on and on about this: i have now bought a gadget that shifts frequency so we can get AM and Ham frequencies (for amusement, like finding numbers stations), a linux mini computer for the weather station monitoring, and a "nano" dongle for the weather station monitor server.

Christine appreciated her gifts: some necklaces and the Apple Pencil Pro. She suggested i had more colors in my box of prismacolors than she had, but i think not. She then made party mix as part of her gift to her sister and her husband, and then we went to visit them for a few hours. On return, i immediately started roasting sweetpotatoes with red onion and seasoned with amchoor (spice gift to myself) and cumin. They turned out wonderfully. Meanwhile, i got a call from my sister about the filthy conditions of the bathrooms my dad had "cleaned." Concerns were raised.

I then headed over to my Dad's place where my brother's family was hosting a gathering of all the same folks as on Christmas Eve. I was early, dinner was late, and i left before desert and the Santa Lucia parade.

Thursday morning my brother's wife M and their son D who is heading to college next year headed to Canada to see Canadian colleges in the cold. Both Thursday and Friday I and my sister went over to my Dad's where with much pushing from me and my sister we got some stuff packed up -- took things for ourselves and made a concrete plan to have an estate sale before Dad moves. And my brother made it clear (enough) to Dad that Dad should not keep the house in hopes my brother will move into it. This with the bathroom filth debacle, has us hoping Dad will move sooner.

Also, on Thursday, after soaking my wild beans for over 24 hours and pouring out the water twice, i slow cooked them for over six hours with the peel heavy bits of the sweet potatoes. This turned out wonderfully. The beans that never plumped up in the soaking, eventually did with the slow cooking. The beans could have gone longer.  Very excited to find them edible. I did forget to add kombu.

Yesterday Christine went to see her sister in Mount Airy, and i stayed home to care for Carrie.  After Christine asked for a birthday card for her sister, i was pulled into a surprise project of going through a bunch of stationary and stationary-adjecent drawers. I think it qualified as "decluttering." I haven't quite finished, but made major progress.

Not sure what today brings. It's ridiculously warm and a downpour is called for this afternoon.

https://interactive-lightning-map.vaisala.com/

Shows the average lightning events per square km per year, world wide. Interesting to see the variation - -and how little lightning is in Scandinavia. (Thinking about Thor....)