elainegrey

In celebration news, i am very busy outside of work with Quaker-involved efforts in causes i care about. The Meeting approved adding our name to this statement on climate change, and as the presiding clerk when we did so, i feel bound to guide our meeting making a "meaningful commitment... to address climate change for our shared future, the Earth and all species, and the generations to come." This will be more or less challenging because there are some folks in Meeting laser focused on green house gas emissions and others focused on the large issue of "how to live sustainably and justly on this Earth."

Another issue is responding to the call for a vigil for Tamir Rice on Sunday 22 Feb. I was asked to come up with queries about "All Lives Matter," which meant a first step in addressing why that is problematic.

There's going through the minutes for the Meeting for worship and reports and decisions for the gathering this coming weekend. My personal inbox wasn't really ready for all the email this has produced and the many threads of discussion and meta-discussion.

Christine is presenting our poster to the first meeting of the Citizen Science Association this evening, which means she's been very busy. I've contributed a teeny bit of editing. I was giddy with joy when i saw her black and white draft on Monday night: she presents us in such a polished and clear way. I hope this evening is not triggering for her but a encouraging and warm welcome from a broader community.

Work is OK. Stress is lower. I've a little itty bit of resentment building with my New Manager that i am working to manage. He has an issue with my vocabulary (larger than his, apparently) and is creating a frame for others (most critically our product person) that "[Elaine's] communication is way over everyone's heads." While there is some important critique of my communication to which i need to respond, i'm also feeling a little like i'm being seen through someone else's projection.

A blush of mental spring: I found a thread of mental creativity this morning and held on tightly. It wasn't until hours later, as i was following the thread, that i realized today was the cross quarter day. My winter, my "no" season, my fallow period is November through January. I'd rather it not be a whole quarter and instead from Yule to 1 February. The holidays take a chunk of time in there, though, and the light is noticeably short for me at this latitude from late October through the early part of February. So, honoring my own rhythms, i give myself leave to not follow through, stay at home, and so on, this dark part of the year.

And i think the rest works wonders for me. The way my thoughts were skipping along this morning, the sense of possibility and opportunity: it's a quickening like sap rising and seeds beginning to germinate.

Huzzah!

--==∞==--

I continue to reflect on changing the patterns of my day. This past week i've been lax with my somatic practice, so i want to renew that this week. What really strikes me though is a question about how to best use the morning energy i have: another question of following my own cycles. The read-write-plan bit just isn't working. Part is due to needing to also be present for Christine's grief, which hits her hard in mornings. Part is due to my sleeping later. I'm assuming without the adrenaline of the previous role, i'm catching up on rest.

Still, there's really not enough time for read-write-plan.

I'm thinking that i need to plan in the evening -- but there i need to take care. Planning right before bed can either catch my evening depression or activate a certain amount of adrenaline that makes it hard to go to sleep. Journaling is also something that might move to the evening.

I'm getting fairly good at a practice of tidying up my work to-do list at the end of the day: i'd like to do that with my personal to do list, as well.

Thus, an experiment for this week. Maybe this will lead to a more engaged evening for me, as well.