elainegrey

Tuesday's brief clarity of breathing was a delight (and so i posted from the car as Christine drove me home). But then i was wiped out by the appointment. At least this time i closed my eyes to not see the pliers.

Tuesday to Wednesday night was the first with the CPAP. I had switched to an unheated tube, but the humidity meant condensed water and gurgling half the night. The other half the night everyone else in the house kept waking up: at one point i realized Christine was up looking under the furniture. She believed Marlowe had brought in a third skink and it was loose. Two others had been rescued on Tuesday and removed to the area Beyond the Pets, where hopefully the colony of traumatized skinks is thriving. Carrie barked sharply several times. Edward picked on Luigi. On the 5:30 am screaming of Luigi from the living room, i stalked out and Edward raced to the kitchen. I closed him in there. No rewards for picking on Luigi (except usually it's just before time to feed them anyhow).

Yesterday i saw my sister who has been struggling to get her ADHD meds -- it was so good to see and chat, i've missed her, and it's clear how hard it's been for us to get together -- then grocery shopping, then three hours having highlights put in my hair and bangs cut. (I like our stylist and we chat most of the time. Which is very tiring at the end.) I have to wear a strap around my head with a hook on which my glasses rest for the next month to protect the nose. I figure if i hate the bangs, i can tuck them out of the way with band. But the bangs soften the impact of the stupid strap.

Today first day back to work. I don't think i've been away this long since the move in 2016? The work issues of May 1st still bring up shame for me now when i think of work. I know that two weeks is an eternity and everyone has probably forgotten.

I wanted to use my flame weeder Sunday, but only had a small window before the winds kicked in. I did get the drive done. Goal with flame weeder was specifically to make sure the whole width of the drive is used as opposed to letting the edges go to tough weeds. Use an herbicide, was the general advice, but flaming it seems slightly less of a negative impact. Everything dried out with the low humidity. Yesterday we had a significant rain so went out with the flame weeder and was able to flash the stiltgrass coming up in mulches and other places in the veggie garden.

Also over last weekend i built a lovely blackberry trellis. I don't know if the blackberries would have survived Sunday morning's 27°F frosts better on the ground or not. The frost hit the mulberry leaves and pawpaw flower buds on the one grafted pawpaw. (The seedling pawpaws are taking their good time to develop branches.) I wasn't expecting 27°F so i didn't cover the blueberries - the early flowers are definitely going to have been damaged.

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I have moderate sleep apnea, apparently. I am going to have nasal surgery sometime this summer or fall so it's likely that will be an improvement. And i could loose weight, which - maybe this will be motivation? But the real issue with weight loss is stress eating or possibly ADHD self-medication with sugar and salt. We discussed getting a mouth brace, which the doctor thought would be about half the cost of a CPAP. My first thought was that would be a way to bridge now to surgery and give weight loss a chance. But, no, the mouth braces aren't appropriate for someone with TMD (jaw issues).



I took yesterday as a mental health day. Just had not been focusing on priorities at work. Family stuff was heavy. So slept in, had a spring tonic breakfast, took a long bath with music and strawberries and grapes and a gardening book i didn't pay that much attention to. Doctor's visit followed by visiting the the farm store where i picked up more t-posts and lettuces that aren't THAT much smaller than some of the sad romaine i've seen in the grocery. (With rabbits excluded, i think i can get those big enough for eating and recover the cost of the plants.) Home where, after the rain stopped, i did the flame weeding. Walked around looking at plants and trees. Watched a couple episodes of Loki, which -- ok, interesting premise -- and dinner and an episode of The Book of Boba Fett, which we are enjoying, bed.

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I do think treating the sleep apnea might be something that helps me in ways i don't anticipate. The brain fog i've muttered to myself for years, which i had only recently decided was a cognitive distortion (looking back at when i had been stressed and thinking of that as a sharper more effective time) -- that could be lack of sleep. It's nice to think i could fix it.